Highlights of Summer 2009 Part 1 (from May to June)

today is my last day of summer vacation; i start my first day of college tomorrow. (aaah!) this summer, there were some great times, some boring times, some hard-working times, but most importatnly, there were times when i learned some of the most immportant leasons of this life. so admist the last minute errands i have to do today to get ready for the big day, i've decided to step back and take a moment to remember the summer between high school and college....

*riding in the gator at our family friend's farm (this was the kick off to my summer)- i hadn't been to this family's farm in a while, but since their son was graduating as well, i figured i'd give a fellow 2009 graduate my congrats. but i honestly had so much fun, riding on this mini tractor with my friends and family through their 100 and some acres of farmland. it truly is beautiful out there and for me, it's nice every once and awhile to get away from civilization.

*graduating from high school (i have to put this one down)- this day went by so fast i still think i'm in high school! (kidding) the best part of this day was listening to the speeches. (yea i know i'm crazy) but all of the speeches made me truly look back on my high school experience....a lot of high school was bad, but there were some truly memorable experiences that i will save for another blog. i'm glad high school is over, but it did help me grow up and i actually did learn a thing or two! (plus i met my awesome boyfriend, so thats a big plus)

*going to myrtle beach with my family- i'll admit, at first i wasn't looking forward to this trip only b/c spending two weeks with JUST my family can drive me insane! looking back, that seems so spoiled and selfish...and it is. i mean it is two weeks at the beach, with the sun out every day getting you tan and all you have to do is....nothing! i did end up enjoying myself; my sister's and i really bonded and created some good memories! (plus i got a very nice tan)

*being forced to job hunt 4 hours every day until i got a job- this was bad period of summer for me. i did have a job, but it was only giving me on average 9 hours a week and that was just not cutting it for a new college kid. but i'll admit, i wasn't really motivated to go find another job. so my parents finally decided to take matters into their own hands; every day (except the weekends) i had to go up and down different streets asking for applications for 4 hours. and i had to do this before doing anything fun that day. plus, i had to keep a record of every place that i went to. (as in it had to have headers and columns with information including, the place i went to, if they were hiring, their phone number, who to call to follow up, etc.) yea this was a big pain in my butt! but, as much as i hate to admit, this did pay off eventually....which you can read about in part 2 of this blog...

Broken Hearts

so you think you know a person; you trust them, care about them, and really like them. that is of course untill you realize they aren't who you think they are. they break your heart, stab you in the back, take advantage of your trust...the list can go on and on. but whatever they did, it hurts like nothing else. the pain cuts through your heart like a dager and you feel like you can't breathe ever again.

but unfortunately for me, i NEVER let things go. i ask my self over and over again "how did this happen?" i can never get over how they weren't really who i thought they were. i trust way too easliy and my judgement was fooled. how? how did i not see?

but then the other hard part is that i can't stop thinking about the good times we had. when we had good talks, when we laughed about dumb problems, when we both found ways to sneak to see each other, when we talked about our shared opinions on government....yep, can't stop thinking about it. and thats what makes it so hard to forget you; i still remember you as the person i thought you were.

Taking My First Step

so for weeks i've been meaning to start a blog, but i just never really got around to it until now of course. but because this idea has been running through my head for so long, i startetd to brainstorm about my first blog post. i figured that it should be an introductionary blog about me: my name, age, hobbies, talents, blah blah blah. but then, i decided that you can figure out who i am exactly by what i write about.

i keep too many of my thoughts, feelings, opinions all locked up in my mind. i want my blog to be a way for me to kind of release my "inner mind" and get me into a habit of free-lance writing. i want to be a great writer and author someday, so i'm hoping this will be good practice for me.

unfortuantely, i do tend to care what people think of me, so i am nervous to do this. but, if i want to write books one day, this is the first step to write down what i think and have people read it. i think i've tried to write a book since i was little, but i could never let anyone read it; i was afraid of what they would think. and your asking yourself "if she's afraid to let people read what she writes, why or how is she going to be an author?" haha, good question! thats another reason i'm writing this blog; to step out of my comfort zone and get used to people reading about my thoughts, feelings, experiences, opinions, and my wild and crazy imagination :)